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What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and one is a pause at the end of a clause.

England doesn’t have a kidney bank, but they do have a Liverpool.

After months of wanting a light purple marker at work, I finally found one. It was the highlight of my day.

No matter your opinion of the police, always call 911 if you see a tsunami. They’re huge emergent seas.

I was able to get into an exclusive kite festival for free. My friend pulled a few strings for me.

I had an amazing childhood; my dad used to roll us down hills in tires. Those were Goodyears.

My friend Jay had twins recently and had been hoping to name them after him. I suggested Kay and Elle.

I may try to use contractions more often, but it can get confusing. Maybe I won’t, maybe I’ll.

I tried the new Bible-themed restaurant called ‘The Lord Giveth.’ They also do take away.

To make extra money, our professor requires all of his students buy his book at the beginning of the term. It’s textbook economics.